Humor

Matt Woleske (2015-16)

Justice Abrahamson, working at a paper-strewn desk

As so many others have said, the Chief (and though she had been recently removed from that position by constitutional amendment, that was always what I called her) worked incredibly hard. So much so that I remember realizing at one point that she and I had surely spent more hours together that year than she’d spent with Seymour, even including time they were asleep. Most of our time together was spent in the law clerk’s office, her office having long ago been given over to the tremendous volume of papers, books, trinkets, and awards she’d accumulated over the years. She sat at […]

While I was clerking for the Chief, the state constitution was amended to enable the justices to elect their chief. They day after the election, there was a vote, and the Chief was no longer the Chief (though naturally we still called her “Chief” and even answered the phones that way). She did not show even a hint of sadness or frustration in response to this unprecedented event. Instead she filed a lawsuit and said to whoever called her cell, “They gave me lemons and I’m making lemonade.” Her reaction that day was a good summation of her personality — […]

Joanne Lin, smiling, next to Shirley Abrahamson

Twenty-six years after my clerkship, it’s the small things I remember, including: The power of red grapes: I didn’t know that they were Shirley’s secret manna. How many nights and weekends did we together feed on those little red things, which kept us going…

Three Stooges

In response to Justice Sandra Day O’Connor lamenting that barely one-third of Americans can name all three branches of government:
“I bet you they can name all three stooges.” – Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson

Shirley ‘The Body’ Abrahamson

“I hope this election is not going to be about aerobics. I have been introduced across the state as Shirley ‘The Body’ Abrahamson.” -Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson

Teenagers Driving

“The toughest decision I’ve made is whether to give my kid the car keys when he was 16.” – Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson

Dinner Decisions

“I always try and sit next to somebody at a dinner who seems to have good taste because whatever they order from the menu, I’m going to order so I don’t have to make another decision.” – Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson

Career in judiciary

“I would strongly urge the women in the audience to consider a career in the judiciary. Judging seems to be tailor-made for women. Judging is physically light work—generally no heavy lifting is required. Judges are often heard to complain that they are overworked and underpaid, characteristics typically ascribed to ‘women’s work.’ And should a judge decide to bear a child, her robe is a perfect maternity dress.”

Why I Call My Husband ‘Honey’

“I cannot remember people’s names. That’s why I call my husband Honey.” -Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson

Hug a Judge

“If you want to take the law into your own hands, hug a judge.” -Chief Justice Shirley S. Abrahamson